How to Tell Stories for Your Family

The tradition of storytelling has become less and less common, and yet the power of stories stays the same. We still consume them, just in short-form digital pieces or other formats, and more than ever, your family needs to know stories. Why? Because stories are your way to communicate what matters most to your family. It’s a gift that can be passed on from one generation to the next.

As you learn how to become a storyteller, we have a few keys to help you share effectively.

4 Tips to Telling Stories

1. Structure: To begin telling stories, use a simple structure to help you present the information clearly. Try this formula: Scene, Action, Result. 
2. Scene: Scene means you help set the stage by describing the situation or background to this story. What details or context are needed? Timing, people involved, past events that happened that impact it, etc. (“When your grandfather was 40, he had just started a new job after many years at the same company.”)
3. Action: Next, describe the key actions that happened. What problem occurred? What did the person do? (“After his first month, he started to notice the truth wasn’t always being shared. He asked to talk to his boss to propose a solution.”)
4. Result: And lastly, the most important part is to close with the result. This is where you share what happened because of those actions, the impact that occurred. You convey the lesson or insights here. (“Because he chose to leave that job, it became a defining point for him never to compromise on integrity.”)

Use this format to help you order your thoughts and select the relevant details to focus on.

As you follow that story format, think about how you can demonstrate or explain the emotions and situations. Rather than saying “He was upset”, consider how you can show this. “He had to leave the room so he could calm down” gives more illustration and detail. It’s not something you have to overdo, but look for those key moments that would benefit from fully conveying what occurred.

“Start with the end in mind” is a simple mantra to keep your stories focused. When you know the lesson you want to share, you can use that to stay on track with what you share. Keep the details and actions tied back to that core message you are wanting to convey. 

For example, if your story is about how integrity became a core value to your family, focus on the particular challenges in the story that were related to that. The goal of a story isn’t always to share every single detail. You just need to choose your emphasis.

One of the things that can be overlooked in stories is the need for authenticity and vulnerability. It’s easy to want to sugarcoat the stories that are not so pretty in our family history. There isn’t always a good resolution to all the stories. 

However, vulnerability is where trust-building begins. Your family has to know how to overcome the bad and painful moments. It’s a story, but it doesn’t have to define them. So share authentically and invite people into the process for how your family grows from that experience.

Now that you have these four tips, it’s time to go practice. Choose one of your family’s values and find a story that relates to this, and try practicing how you would share it!

Telling stories is a simple practice but as you integrate it into your family’s rhythms, it can make all the difference. It’s just one more essential building block to creating a strong family! Keep growing.