How to Practice Family Values through Generosity

Establishing values as a family helps you build a foundation that keeps your family anchored. Values are those principles of behavior that guide your actions and purpose. However, we also know the challenge with values is learning how to apply them to your everyday life. You don’t want them to be stifling rules or just a nice idea that is forgotten.

From our work with families over the years, the number one area we have seen that makes a difference in activating your family values is the practice of family generosity. It is the easiest way to gather your family to find agreement around values and actively put them into practice.

Let’s talk through what it looks like to connect values to generosity and steps for a values-based family giving plan. Make sure to download our guide to use for your family’s plan!

How Family Values Connect to Generosity

Values can be defined as ethical or moral principles of behavior, or you can think of them in more simple terms; they are like anchors, cornerstones, or compass points. (Learn more about this definition here.) They help set a standard. That is where generosity comes in.

To set a standard of behavior, it takes time and practice, repetition. Giving generously as a family is an easy way to develop that practice more quickly as opposed to having to wait for scenarios to come up to test your values as a family. Giving allows you to identify what matters and have conversations as a family around these areas. It is the easiest way to bring your family to the table and discuss values.

With that understanding of how family giving amplifies values, it’s time to take the next step by creating a family giving plan that aligns with your values.

Making Your Family Values Giving Plan

To begin practicing your values through family giving, you need a plan to help guide your next steps. Use these points to help begin the conversation:

1. Hold a family meeting that is focused specifically on your family giving plan.
2. Start by leading everybody to the big picture perspective by reviewing your family’s values together. Share why these values are important to you and reflect on the stories that best represent those family values.
3. Discuss the types of causes, not organizations, that also align with those stories and values you have shared. Ask everybody to contribute ideas and perspective here.
4. Now discuss the opposite side– what are the causes that would feel less in alignment with your values? What attributes make them less of a resounding yes for your family?
5. Identify the types of goals your family would like to accomplish through its giving plan.
   1. What type of impact do you hope to make?
   2. Is there a dollar amount to give? Or a type of service you want to offer?
   3. How will everyone participate in it? (ie. Our goal is everyone comes back with 1 story of generosity. Or everyone takes a specific role this year in the giving plan. etc.)
6. With those goals and causes in mind, now you can transition into identifying specific giving opportunities. Ensure everyone has an equal voice here.
   1. Are there specific initiatives you want to invest in through your family giving?
   2. What organizations come to mind that tie with the values and causes you’ve discussed?
   3. Based on the stories you’ve shared, what opportunities would you be most excited to give to?
   4. What type of area do you want to focus on? (ie. local vs global. Startup project vs regular funding, etc.)

Once you walk through this family giving process, make sure you document next steps and who is responsible for those items. (Download our giving plan PDF to add your notes!) 

Taking the Next Step for Family Values & Giving

Now that you have a first draft of a family giving plan, the most important thing you can do is continue to practice. Look for opportunities beyond just finances. What are the other ways your family can live generously? The more you practice and reaffirm the behaviors that tie to your values, the clearer in purpose your values will become to your family.

If you need help continuing the conversation on values, you will want to save all these conversation starters! View them all in our guide here.