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Evaluating Your Family Dynamic

Evaluating Your Family Dynamic

3 Questions to Ask to Evaluate Family Growth & Health

 

Having a regular way to measure how your family is growing or where it needs improvement can be an essential tool to stay on track. As you create your vision and mission, you also need to define checkpoints along the way to give you guidance and figure out where to course correct. 

Here are 3 questions you can use to perform a quick family assessment. To walk through this process, we recommend that you let people answer these questions individually and then come back together to share feedback. You could even have your family fill in detail for the other numbers on the scale so you have a personalized standard for your family. 

1. On a scale of 1-10, how open is our communication?

  • 10: We are easily able to share concerns and talk about ideas with clear understanding.
  • 5: We tend to wind up in conflict, but eventually we’ll get to a resolution.
  • 1: Issues are swept under the rug and we struggle to believe the best in one another which leads to the communication challenges.

The goal of this question is to help identify weak areas or potentially to address unresolved conflict. We ask about openness because quality communication starts with that attribute. Open communication means there is a desire to understand and to share life with one another.

2. On a scale of 1-10, how unified are we?

  • 10: We are clear on our purpose and we are naturally moving in the same direction with joy.
  • 5: We tend to lose what matters with being busy or other issues going on, but when we do reconnect, it is encouraging.
  • 1: We disagree on priorities and struggle to see how vision connects to what we’re doing.

Diving into unity next can help give insight on what matters for your family and where you are losing focus. You can use this assessment to prompt further digging into where these issues are stemming from– is it lack of clarity, over-commitment, life change, etc?

3. On a scale of 1-10, how well are we navigating challenges?

  • 10: We are able to find a path forward that is tied to purpose and we are intentionally encouraging each other along the way.
  • 5: We aren’t always sure how to intentionally tackle a challenge, so it takes a lot of effort to figure out a plan and to get everyone on board.
  • 1: The challenges we face tend to derail us and build up frustration with each other. We don’t follow through.

In this last question, you are helping assess what might be holding your family back in growth whether it is a blindspot or simply needing dedicated time. Your family’s growth is directly related to how well you know how to tackle challenges or implement new plans. Look for how you can continue to improve this.

Next Steps from Your Family Assessment

Now that your family has worked through these questions, you will want to gather together and share input. Set clear guardrails around this time to hear all perspectives openly and not to bring personal attacks. You want to find what problem to solve, not who to solve. Make sure you also celebrate the wins and where you have grown.

If your family is on the lower side of the scale and navigating active challenges, don’t be discouraged. Instead, let this be an active place to bring encouragement first. You want your family to be connected in the process together. Make it a goal to identify clear action steps. Consider adding your own questions to the assessment that will help monitor what is important.

Don’t forget to set a check-in point where you will go through this exercise again. Depending on your family’s season of life, you can pick the frequency that makes the most sense. Encourage your family that they don’t have to wait until the check-in to bring up issues either though. This assessment can be a helpful tool to initiate conversations as a whole!

Need help with active reminders and ways to grow your family? Join “The Multi-Generational”, our free email resource, where we will send you regular free training from our ministry.

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