3 Keys for Sharing the Less than Perfect Family Stories

When it comes to your family stories, likely there are moments of joy and victory, but there is also the reality of failings, old wounds, or painful losses. Both types of stories need to be told for families to gain the lessons that matter, but talking through these less-than-perfect stories isn’t always easy. Don’t shy away from these opportunities though as they still are a way to share about redemption or the lessons gained.

Learn 3 of our keys on how to approach sharing these family stories.

1. Assess When and How to Share These Stories.

While stories do need to be told, it is also important to start first with the context of your family and how that may impact sharing stories. Consider these potential situations: 

• If you have young children, consider saving certain stories for an appropriate date or age depending on the content. 
• If your family is working through active conflict or communication challenges and your story is related to that type of struggle, make sure the story will not hinder this process or feel like it is being weaponized.
• If your family is just beginning to dive into understanding a particular value or theme, consider the right timing of stories. What will help aid, not hurt, understanding at their current stage?

Make sure you are clear on the intentions for sharing any story and examine your own heart before you begin that process. Stories are not to prop certain people up, shame others, or to justify decisions. They should always tie back to values and God’s purpose for your family.

2. Approach Challenging Stories with Honesty and Vulnerability.

At its most basic level, honesty and vulnerability are key to sharing difficult stories. You want to avoid hiding the truth or quickly glossing over the details just to rush to the end where it gets better. Even though stories may not always have a pretty result, if your family can see what it has looked like to navigate pain, it can give not only lessons but maybe even hope and reconnection.

3. Convey Lessons and Teach On Finding Meaning.

When it comes to sharing family stories of pain or challenges, make sure you are clear on the lessons learned, where God showed up, and how those things were learned. Even if the story itself did not have a redemptive moment, it can still be an opportunity to teach how your family is choosing not to repeat what happened or why you now view that as a turning point of change, for example.

Being able to articulate both the lessons and how that meaning was discovered starts to give your family their own framework to find meaning in their experiences and seek God in that.

There Is Hope Even in the Challenge

With these 3 keys in mind, as you navigate family storytelling, let it continue to encourage you to share your family stories. These narratives, though challenging, can foster further empathy and deeper connections within the family. It becomes a way to build bridges generationally.

If your family is looking for how to navigate its journey, keep exploring Legacy Stone to find how we can best serve your family.