3 Key Indicators for Building Strong Families

80% of people across the world say family ranks as very important to them, according to the Integrated Values Survey. However, despite this being a value, building strong families in and of itself can be a major challenge. We have to know how to translate what we care about into action.

To build a strong family, you first need to know what your warning indicators are and the inverse of what success looks like. Drawing from research and our own experiences with coaching families for years, we have 3 key indicators your family should start with for understanding success.

Building a Strong Family Key Indicator #1

Your Family Communication Pathway

The number one cause of failure we see across families simply is communication. We fail to communicate what matters, and we struggle to navigate conflict well. Those two areas alone are enough to keep a family stuck.

If you want to build a strong family, you need to pay attention to your family’s communication pathway:

• Do you have a defined process that you follow consistently for how you do conflict?
• Does your family have regular conversations to talk about your direction and values?
• Can your family articulate the key stories and lessons that shape you all?
• Do you have a consistent behavior of affirmation and encouragement as a family?

These areas can be your indicators of success or where you need to pay attention early on. Try using a Communication Assessment scorecard to get a deeper insight into the potential issues.

Building a Strong Family Key Indicator #2

Your Family Values Alignment

According to research from Dennis Jaffe with JP Morgan, one of the top indicators for families that last generations is “a motivating core mission and set of values. Their values define and sustain a consistent, resilient and successful culture of both family and business.”

If you want to know where to start building your family’s foundation, start with values. The purpose of values is they act like compass points to your family. They help you know which way is true north.

When your family begins to draft from those values, it is an early warning sign to look for:

• Are you making decisions in alignment with values and being intentional to bring values into your decision making?
• How confidently does your family act in agreement with values and have clear insight into how the values apply?
• Do you have regular habits to live out your values as a family?

Building a Strong Family Key Indicator #3

Shared Family Identity

In our Western society, independence tends to be the primary goal and focus for raising children. However, a strong family will give its next generation both roots and wings; this is the idea of interdependence. 

When we know who we are as a family, a collective unit, it changes the dynamic. We support not just each others’ individual ambitions but we also lean into our family identity of what we want to accomplish together.

To stay on track, you need to pay attention to:

• Do we have a clear vision of what we are working towards as a family?
• Are we clear on the traits and behaviors that we want to define our family’s identity?
• Are we intentional in how we stay connected?

By building these ways to stay interdependent, while still supporting individuals, you’ll create a healthier balance.

Great Families Get Intentional

Now that you have these 3 indicators to pay attention to, you need to start your game-plan. The strongest families we’ve seen all have regular, consistent routines to evaluate their health and to have conversations about their next steps. It isn’t fancy, complex work, but just about repetition and consistency.

If you want to take a next step to setting those consistent routines, you should implement the practice of a family meeting where you have a set agenda and space to talk through these key indicators.

Need help beginning these key foundations for a family? We developed our 7 Generation Family Legacy Study specifically to help your family get set up for success. You’ll learn communication strategies and how to build your own mission, vision, and values as a family– all the key essentials to a multi-generational family! Learn more at: legacystone.com/families/family-legacy-study