Our family gathered last week to celebrate an important milestone in the life of our son. We attended the ceremony, flew siblings down to be with us, and enjoyed special meals together. It was festive. It was wonderful. But it was incomplete.
It was incomplete, that is, until our final day together. But let me come back to that.
The Bible gives us detailed stories that demonstrate the power of a family blessing, particularly though, a father's blessing. (Of course, mothers bless, too!) The best stories come from the life of Jacob who spoke words of blessing over his children and grandchildren.
His blessing of Josheph’s sons, Ephraim and Manasseh in Genesis 48 included:
I must admit, as a father and grandfather I find that a bit intimidating. My father or grandfathers never spoke that kind of blessing over me. Chances are good, yours didn’t either. Even so, we can still speak words of blessing over our children if we focus on a few questions.
Speaking a blessing means naming three things aloud: what you affirm in them, what you most desire for them, and the vision you hope for your family's future.
First, ask yourself what you want to affirm in them. Is there a character trait, an accomplishment, a difficult season they wrestled through without giving up, or an area of growth in their life? If so, you can name it aloud as an important part of their blessing. Our son just completed medical school, and I named his grit, resilience, and perseverance.
Second, ask yourself what you most desire for them. Jacob’s example serves us well here as most of us want God’s protection, provision and favor over the lives of our children and grandchildren. What else do you deeply desire? Ask God for it in their hearing.
Third, ask yourself, what impact you believe God wants to have through your family in the world? As a blessed family, has God given you a vision for your family to bless others for the next 100 years? If not, begin praying for that and read the book, The Legacy Life by David Green and Bill High. If God has already envisioned you, speak those words over their future.
OK, back to last week. On Friday morning I took our son out for breakfast. It was just the two of us. Earlier that week I wrote a letter of blessing and read it aloud to him (and yes, we both had tears in our eyes by the end). I took the time to write it first because I recognized this was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and because I wanted to record those words of blessing so he could read them again one day after I’m gone.
I encourage you to write down the blessing, but don’t miss this point – we must speak words of blessing, not simply write them down. It wasn’t just the words Grant needed to read, it was also the sound of my voice he needed to hear and the tears in my eyes he needed to see.
I ended my letter with these words:
"I love you and am proud to call you son,
Pops"
Hey dads, hey grandfathers, speaking a blessing over future generations is our privilege and responsibility. I encourage you to choose a child or grandchild to bless over the next 3 months and I would love to hear about your experience. You can email me at tblaylock@legacystone.com.